What To Do?

1. READ jejune (naive and simplistic) views and advise; 2. CHUCKLE, agree, or disagree; 3. COMMENT without fear of retribution 4. KNOW that I appreciate readership!

Monday, January 4, 2010

Introducing . . . the "I-Brain!"

I hope The Knife Show has inspired you to succeed in every way this new year of 2010.  It did me, with the exception of my actual blog about the knife show.  My last blog stunk so much, I thought I would try and make up for it by writing an exciting new entry that was sure to entertain and please.  Let me start by apologizing now. 


See, it all starts while I am doing something really important, like washing the gray right out of my hair or polishing my nails.  It's usually some mandatory task that is designed to make manufacturers of beauty products rich and me temporarily satisfied with my appearance.  There is always a requirement as well that both hands be put to full use, thus leaving me unable to jot down and shre those great ideas that pop into my head.  For example, while taking a shower you remember something important, and as you step out, it's lost in space forever, only to appear again in your subconscious dream of you on a motor cycle riding across the country, rich and free.  Except when you wake up, the great idea, like the winning lottery numbers, escapes once again into thin air along with the motorcycle, never to be retrieved.


Which brings me to this rambling piece of blog, and back to an idea I have injected many times . . . that of a device to be implanted in our heads for moments such as these.  Just think, while you are dying that beard, you might have an epiphany, and alas, you don't need to reach for a pen and paper, or even leave the confines of your bathroom, simply start recording.  You can continue applying your ebony gue with a miniature comb to your facial hair and record away.  So instead of worrying about the limited built in RAM currently provided in our cabazas (that is Spanish for "heads"), we can store as much as we want in words and images (up to a certain amount of megabytes of course.)  My RAM is so limited that even if I was able to hold onto a moment of brilliance from the shower to a notepad, I would surely dump some other important file on the way, like the one containing my name.


I can see it now, Apple will surely be the first to develop it, and it will be called the "I-Brain!"  It will come with proprietary software, contain 100 terabyte of storage, sized smaller than a dime, and be outrageously expensive.  I can't wait.


In the meantime, here are some websites to keep your brain busy, or at least to entertain yourself:  Maybe something will catch your eye.

For People who want to Shut off the Brain: 
1. Chill out by listening to XM Chill on your satellite. Don't have it satellite? See number 3.


2.  Move your neighbor's satellite in the middle of the night.  hee hee, just kidding.


3. Pull up your iTunes on your computer and click on the radio icon on the left. iTunes software is free at http://www.itunes.com/, and so are the radio stations on iTunes.) Pick a genre of music you like. For example, "ambient". Pick a radio station, for example, "Chill". Sit on your couch and close your eyes. Don't turn on the TV, just sit and see how long you can shut your brain off. For those of you who cannot "shut it off" iTunes also has talk radio - for free!


4. Watch a movie on Joost, http://www.joost.com/. It's free! Yes, there are a few commercials, but the movie is uncut and the commercials are minimal (and the same volume).


5. Put up lights in your back yard, not just for 90 days, but permanently brighten it up. Who cares what the neighbors think, or what the UL recommends on Christmas lights.


Can't Shut it off?:
6. Use "the Google" to search yourself on the Internet. It's amazing what you will find.
7. Take free Spanish lessons on the Internet, http://www.123teachme.com/learn_spanish/beginner/


8.  Do a crossword puzzle that is interactive, http://www.usatoday.com/ (go to games).


Ode to the brain power and have a great week!


C

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